Cant bring myself to write.
The anxiety is overwhelming.
Exhaustion from thinking.
How? What if? When? Is it it?
Headache
Payment agreement for back rent
Trip to Obama
Three day work week
Losing two days pay for two historic Black men
Family Reunion
Period ten days long and counting
Invisible papercuts burn
As I wash myself of the crime scene
Got rid of Dexter... again
Horny as hell
Nekked Ex bought himself an engagement ring
Horny as hell
Cant go to South Florida for the Super Bowl
No blanket sales
I am surrounded by herds of pregnant women
Upcoming apartment Town Meeting (read: shouting match)
Upcoming special Board Meeting (the "retreat")
Upcoming regular Board Meeting
My mother might go next (God forbid)
Wake up every morning, sleeping in the Bronx
Wake up fully, still in Boston
Wake up exhausted again
Have to return to choir practice
Dont want to
Told them I would
Cant get to the gym
Down to one pair of boots
One pair of tights
New bras still dont fit
Maybe Im losing more cup sizes
Impossible Bar exam, again?
Angina?
Go for MBA/ CPA?
No tuition money
No educational benefits
No benefits, period
Temp to "perm" again
Horny as hell
Coccyx pain
Pain in the a$$
Pain in my heart
Headache
I cant write it... hurts too much
4 weeks ago
2 comments:
Hang in there Nikki. Somehow I know you will make it.
I feel your hurt through the words, but I have faith that you will.
Get rid of the bad energy... it begets more bad energy.
Go for the bar exam. I know you can do ti. You are too smart not to be able to do it. Believe it and it will happen.
I am currently doing my MBA... paying out of pocket. Sometimes (like right now), I don't even know how I will be able to pull the $5000+ I have to pay in April, but I know I will somehow. Just trust and when you get to the bridge you'll cross it.
Blessings are all around us if we want to see them.
Stay blessed.
Im feeling much better now. But I might have to go for some antianxieties. This month has beenso long and its only half over!
Thanks for the kind words.
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